I began this blog to keep my extended family up-to-date on
my experiences. Admittedly, my rationale was more about not having to relate
the same story over and over and less about really sharing experiences. During
a recent discussion, a close friend who lives thousands of miles away scolded
me for not “blogging about this” when I was telling her about joining a Fantasy
Football league. When I questioned her thought, she responded, “Because, you
are DOING something different, something outside your comfort zone!”
She’s right. This latest “adventure” is happening here at
home but is as intriguing and worrisome as getting off a plane in a country
where I don’t speak the language and hoping for an English speaker guide.
To reference the inestimable Paul Harvey, “Here’s the full
story…so far.”
In April Janet and I were having lunch. I mentioned I was
frustrated because I could not a “something new” to do that didn’t involve me
having to follow a work schedule. (Since retiring, I find scheduled activities
anathema to my happiness and avoid most social ones.) Janet asked what if the
activity was only once a week. That intrigued me. Then she dropped her
bombshell – her brother’s Fantasy Football league had lost a team and was searching for a new member. It would cost a bit of money and a lot of
time but it would definitely class as a “something new” for me.
(Aside: While I know a
teeny bit about the sport, I am not a fan of professional football. I enjoy the
atmosphere and élan of high school and college games. Also, my football jargon
knowledge is was limited to maybe a half dozen terms, most being player
positions.)
A week of so later, I
agreed, was accepted by the league as its newest member and began my rookie
year in football. I needed a team name and logo. Since my favorite professional
sports team of all time is the Tampa Bay Rowdies, I chose that named and Janet,
a wizard with PhotoShop, created a Rowdie Gator logo! Granted this gator holds
a beer but we could find neither a wine-drinking one nor an Elijah Craig
sipping one!
THEN I received a 2 hour indoctrination into the innards of
football. No wonder players begin when they are in elementary school – ANY
foreign language is better learned by a young brain! I comprehended about a fourth of what Janet told me, realizing taking this seriously meant I needed to polish my study skills. I began my two month research into the intricacies of Fantasy Football.
I was frustrated, intrigued and challenged – just what my adventurous
self needed. I read websites and blogs. I listened to sports talk shows on the
radio while driving around, sacrificing NPR for my new experience. My
conclusion after a couple of weeks: I am hopelessly out gunned. I sent Janet and
the League Commissioner a request to audit the league this season so I could be
better prepared for next year. Janet said Don laughed so hard he dropped the
phone talking to her. She called me, accusing me of being a quitter and
informed me no audit I was a baby being thrown into the pond to swim!
I didn’t quit, though I did adopt a new attitude toward this Draft Night challenge – I would take advice from the “pro’s” and learn by watching. I
did not prepare for Draft Night, other than to have printouts of player lists
so I could cross out as I went down the lists. I figured being next to last in
the draft order would give me lots of time to look over my list and coordinate
players remaining in the category with rankings suggested by the on-line gurus.
I (ignorantly) presumed this Draft Night would echo the ones
I had caught glimpses of on television and in the movies: the team makes a bid,
the player is called and has time to percolate the choice, then agrees or
disagrees. The process seemed to take hours. So, I wasn’t worried.
Well, the Greeks were right – hubris will get you.
The draft began and not 6 minutes later I had to name my
first choice. I went with the highest number player available in the category
used by four of the teams before me. Then I realized that the next selector
made her choice and it was back to be. Yikes! What happened to contemplation
time? I repeated what I’d done earlier.
This “Holy Crap! How can it be MY turn again?” scenario
began to get to me. Never wonderful under time-pressure, I began choosing
players based on their names and their injury-status.
THEN my laptop dinged that it was going into low-power mode
and I could not find the power cord, so had to switch to the iPad!
The "Oh, NO, I was going to pick him!/ "You are on the clock!" frenzy lasted for 2 more hours and I never took a potty break. I was mentally exhausted, spiritually depressed by my lack of knowledge and physically wracked from spinning around in my computer chair to check list and list, screen after screen. I was sure, despite encouragement from fellow league members that I was dismal at this.
Then the Rookie Player Fairy waved her wand.
I didn’t do anywhere nearly as
horrifically in player choices and I anticipated, since the CBS Fantasy
Football computer gave a C grade and noted, “You managed to find yourself in the middle of the pack with the 6th
best draft overall. Your overall ranking was reflected in the projections for
your running backs, which we placed as the 5th best in the league.” Beginner’s luck – I fully expected to be 8th,
last place!
After the draft, Janet listened quietly while I reminded her
I would not be joining the others in their communal game-viewing ritual until
late September as I have previous commitments. Then she informed me I still had
to choose line-up – and that she’d mentor me after book club meets this coming Wednesday.
My fellow league members are sure I'll have a great time, now that my toe is in the water. I'm looking forward to lowering my learning curve and becoming at least semi-proficient in football-speak.
Fantasy Football only lasts for 4 months! I can’t decide right
now if that makes me happy or sad, but I am in it until the whistle blows.
(Jeez, I nearly wrote until the buzzer sounds, then realized that’s basketball.
Forgive me, Dad! And watch over me for the next few months!)
